Everything I Need To Know In Life I Learned From X
by ElleThom
Summary: Just a little fic...more musings than anything read and review please...this is what happens when I get bored....


Ok I know this is not my normal offering, but I got to sitting around at home last night on my day off, watching endless reruns of X-files and this hit me, so I ran into my office and began to go nuts. Hope you guys have as much fun reading this as I did writing it. Please review and tell me what you think.

And as for the challenge, here it goes….

What if Scully walked in on Mulder in the midst of….well a little self love? You can choose time and place and season, and make it anyway you want…song fic or whatever, I would only ask three qualifiers:

1: Must involve Diana Fowley, oh you know this IS a challenge. LOL

2: Should also involve one of their previous cases, any one you pick but has to be referenced in the fic

3: I would also need a bear rug in it somewhere.

Not too bad right? You can do it.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Don't agree to meet anyone in person that you have chatted with off the internet, they may be life sucking monsters.

Life is short; we could all die tomorrow, or in 2012.

Cleanliness may be next to Godliness—but disorder is genius.

It shouldn't take an alien abduction to tell someone how you really feel about them.

Always get pictures and evidence**_ before _**you run off to save your partner.

Don't drink the water

Never rent a motel room across from a cow pasture.

Always remember where you left your pencils.

Only re-gift outside of your circle of friends.

You cannot learn agricultural skills from watching BABE

Never give up on a miracle

You need another hole in your head like you need a hole in your head.

Never tackle a situation unarmed.

Smart is sexy

It's not nice to ditch someone, unless you have a really really really good reason

Never break into a government facility without a secondary escape plan

Embrace your spookiness

If you are going to lie to congress, make sure you have an iron clad out.

Sometimes dead is better.

Spend Christmas with someone you love.

Always follow a hunch, your gut never lies

There are real monsters, but most of them hide not under our beds but in our mirror.

Stay focused.

Take comfort in your friends.

Trust No One.

If you find that perfect partner, forget #25

Hospitals are really horrible places for spending time together.

Never order mushrooms on pizza…

A little faith can lead to miracles; a lot of faith can lead to obsession.

There is a reasonable and logical answer for everything, but its varying perceptions of reasonable and logical that cause conflicts.

Never leave a witness or suspect alone too long, they always tend to disappear—or die.

Just because you are paranoid doesn't mean they are not all out to get you.

While science may unravel most of life's mysteries, conscience makes us tangle them up again.

Why they put the "I" in FBI.

Make sure you leave nothing in your past that can come back and bite you in the ass.

It never rains sleeping bags

There is no such thing as a nice trip to the forest.

Always wear clean underwear; you never know when you'll end up in the ICU.

Big Brother really is watching.

Plane rides are fun if you travel with the right person.

Beware if bees.

Don't believe everything you hear and only half of what you see.

The word gullible is not in the dictionary.

Smoking is bad for your health.

The world did not end on January 1, 2000; it ended May 19, 2002

Russia is a nice place to visit, but you wouldn't want to be interned there

Not many people know what exsanguination really means.

Everyone has a hidden agenda

Children are a precious gift; enjoy them while you have them for however long that may be.

Be careful what you wish for, for it may come true.

Past spouses make for present hassles and future squabbles.

It's never about what you are eating—its what's eating you.

Always have someone in your corner that can throw out enough big words to stupefy everyone in the room, especially your contradictories.

Even the worst parents still hold the secrets to your past.

Never underestimate the vertically challenged.

Sometimes loving someone is knowing when to let go.

Waterbeds can be hazardous to your health.

Only the good die young.

Stupid is as stupid does.

Love is the only true follie a deux

A dream is the answer to a question you have not figured out how to ask yet.

Playing house is fun, but one should also know when it is time to put away childish things.

Boating should be left to the professionals.

Jeremiah was a bullfrog.

We all want to believe.

At least consider the extreme possibilities

Red wine and candles are a bad combination.

How much strange behavior from your partner does it take to realize that he is NOT really your partner?

People usually speak from the heart when they are heavily medicated.

Clones have a short shelf life.

Enough innuendos can wear down anyone's resolve.

Chris Carter is a genius

The fix is in and the government is hip to the truth and part of the conspiracy

Some memories should be left repressed.

Hips before hands…

Family can be a real bitch

Secrets cannot stay buried forever, eventually all the chickens come home to roost.

You can rationalize your way out of or into anything.

Always leave a spare key with someone you trust

Cheating on your spouse can drive them nuts.

Its good to have sources in high places, but beware of those in dark trench coats.

Any obstetrician with a collection of jarred fetuses on display must have a low success rate.

Don't watch too much TV

Sometimes a light in the sky is just a light in the sky…but sometimes it can lead to an impromptu three month vacation.

Serial killers are seriously fucked up individuals.

Its not good to spend all of your time alone

One cat is a cute curiosity, thousands are a mad killing pack.

Love is patient

The best relationships are those that start off as friends

Love means never having to say I'm sorry I forgot to give you back your ova

Even the losers get lucky sometimes

Never go to bed angry

You can't always be right.

You can't always be wrong

Batting cages are a really good first date.

Putting an X before a word started here—X marks the spot.

Ice melts at 98.6

People tend to move out of your way when you wave a badge and gun

Buddhism may hold some of the keys to life's mysteries

The truth is out there.


End file.
